Allahumma inni a’oozubika min ‘ilmil laa yanfa’u, wa min qalbil laa yakhsa’u, wa min nafsil laa tashba’u, wa min d’awatil la justajabu laha

Oh Allah, I seek refuge in You from knowledge that does not benefit, and from a heart which is not submissive, a soul which has an isatiable appetite, and a supplication which is not heard. 

(Source: thecloudwithsilverlining)

I love how Allah Subhana wa Ta’Aala makes things easy for us. Everything happens at exactly the right time, in exactly the right way.

Five years ago, when I was so extremely close to Him and nothing else mattered. Dunya was not a priority anymore, because Dunya had been put on a hold for one year. All that mattered was Deen. From the moment I woke up to the moment I went to sleep. Those nights in which I had one particular dream, so intense, so beautiful, so real, so unforgettable. I felt in my heart I was doing it right and my love for Him grew stronger and stronger every second.

After a year I was introduced to Dunya again, with its glittery temptations. I managed to resist them for a while, but then I fell again. I fell hard. However, somewhere I knew I had to hold on to the rope I was given. I held on, I didn’t let go. I always made this du’a: Ya MuQallib’ul Quluub, sabbit Qalbi ‘Aala Deenik. (O Turner of the hearts, make my heart steadfast on Your Deen.) Slowly but steadily I started climbing up again, using that same rope.

Our teachers had already told us this would happen to us. Everything that was in our control that year would slip out of our hands like sand that slips through the spaces between your fingers. It was true, a lot did slip out of my hands. But not the rope. He had created this rope for me. How could I let it go? He loves me, why wouldn’t I love Him? 

He reminded me when I was at a low point. He showed me how precious our minutes on this earth are. This worldly life is just a drop in the ocean of the life of the Hereafter. I saw with my own eyes, it doesn’t take very long for the angel of Death to take out our soul. 

A quote I posted a few days back by Yasmin Mogahed, and like to quote again:

Many of us think we can live our lives however we want, and then at the time of death just say ‘la illaha illah Allah’. But at the time of death, the tongue cannot speak—except what the heart commands. Whatever is in the heart will come out. If that heart was full of only love of dunya, that will speak. If the heart was full of love of status, love of wealth, love of the creation over the Creator, it is that which will speak. If the heart was full of grudges, jealousy, hatred, that will speak. But if it was full of the love of Allah, that will speak. If in your life, your heart carried only ‘la illaha illa Allah’…that truly there is no refuge, no shelter, no deity worthy of worship but Him’—then, only then, will the tongue be given permission to say: “la illaha illah Allah, Muhammad rasool Allah.”

I want to be like my grandfather and pass away like my grandmother.

I remember his fingers on his tasbih and his lips moving with the dhikr of Allah. He always used to pray his salah on time and always reminded us to offer our prayers. He was a strong man. In his old age, he still wanted to do everything himself. He wouldn’t tell me to cut fruit and bring it to him. Instead he always told me to bring him a plate, fruit and a knife. The one thing he did tell me to do, was make him tea. He loved my tea, because I made it the way he wanted it. :’) When he got ill, he forgot everything. Everything, except for his salah. SubhanAllah. He did not want to do masaa on his feet, because he wanted to his wudhu properly. He prayed one salah numerous of times. We wondered why he would do that. We got the answer the last few weeks before he passed away. He was making up for the time he would be laying in that hospital bed in the last days of his life… 

I remember my grandmother getting up early to recite Qur’an. She loved reading the Qur’an. She wasn’t very educated, but she knew Deen was the most important thing in life. She was such a strong woman. As the eldest of her siblings, she always tried so hard to keep the family ties strong. Whenever there was a problem, people would come to her for solutions and she would help them with her heart and soul. Everyone knew her and my grandfather, because they were socially involved. They cared about other people’s fate. They all showed up on their janazahs… One morning she woke up for Fajr, went back to sleep… and she never woke up. The moment she will wake up, she will meet her Lord.

May Allah have mercy on their souls, forgive them for any wrongdoings and place them in the higher ranks of Jannah… ameen.

These were two of the main occasions that drew me back to Him. Then He made sure I was taken out of the environment that had nothing left to give me, because the two very influential persons in my life were with Him now. 

He put me in a new environment, made me meet new people, who made me stronger in my Deen. He made it possible for me to take the step I wanted to take. Alhamdulillah. He works in wondrous ways. It is beyond me. That is how amazing He is. 

At the end of the day it all boils down to doing what is in your power and trusting Him to take care of the rest. I know He will take care of it, because I know He loves me. He loves each and every one of us. So why be afraid to reach out to Him? :) Don’t be afraid, you’ll be amazed at what He will do for you. Just try?

May Allah bless you and may you have a reason to smile every day… Don’t forget to say Alhamdulillah :)

(Source: thecloudwithsilverlining)